I don't really know an artistic or clever way to begin this post, so this is what the reader gets I suppose...
A big change has recently taken place in my life, one that I'm not exactly thrilled about, but at the same time very at peace with. It's one of those "it's not exactly what you planned or wanted but you know it's ultimately for the best" type of things. I was in an environment that even though I felt I was getting a lot of benefit from, it probably wasn't the healthiest fit for me at this point in my life (well, in retrospect, not sure if it was a good fit at any point in my life). Either way, the Lord took me away, taught me a lot, and then brought me back home.
Sometimes we question whether or not God knows what he is doing. Did he do the right thing? How does this make sense? What was he trying to teach me here? Why would he do that? Then we have to remind ourselves of what it means to be God. It means all power, authority, knowledge, and sovereignty, which simply means, yes. He knows what he is doing, and he knows why.
The beautiful thing about faith is that we have no idea what we are doing sometimes. Perhaps this is disheartening, and maybe sometimes a little nerve-racking. Ok, it can be downright scary, but there is one check that I'll be taking to the bank:
"No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly.
O Lord of hosts, blessed is the one who trusts in you." -Psalm 84:11-12 (ESV)
Stay faithful to his promises, and he will not withold his blessing. Don't misunderstand, this is not about him rewarding us if we keep our end of the bargain (this wouldn't be grace-driven faith). It's not about our efforts in behaving properly or appearing "super spiritual." I think sometimes we have this mentality (even though we may have been taught otherwise) that we need to try really hard, then maybe, if we are good enough, God will love us more.
Honestly, I think our misunderstanding (my own included) may be a result of not understanding the Scriptures fully. Take, for example, one of my favorite verses, Romans 8:28:
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." (NIV)
You see, I think when we remember this verse, we tend to stop after the first half. We say, "Yeah, God works for the good of those who love him." And it ends there. So we have this understanding that if we love God, things are going to be good for me, so I better "do good" in loving him...or else.
The problem is, we can't love God. Nothing within our own selves wants to do that. We aren't in even the least bit remotely interested. We just. Don't. Care (see Romans 3:10-18).
This is why I have emphasized the word called. To my knowledge, the second clause of the verse, "who have been called according to his purpose," is actually defining the preceeding phrase, "those who love him," meaning that those who love him are those who have been called.
You see, we cannot love God unless he has called us and loved us first. "We love because he first loved us," says 1 John 4:19 (see also Romans 5:6-8). The only way we can truly love and trust in him is because he has loved us first. If we do not have his love, it will be impossible for us to love him back. Without him, we have not the slightest inclination on wanting to love, or even on how to do it.
I say all of this intently to bring us back to the main point with a full(er) understanding. It is NOT up to us to determine whether or not "all things" will work toward our good. We are faithful to God because he is faithful to us, and HE will be the one to sustain that end (1 Thessalonians 5:23-24), as well as any other end he wishes to bless us with to his glory.
So relax. Chill. The pressure's off.
When things seem cloudy, trust that Jesus knows what he is doing. Trust that he is already working on what is coming next. Trust that he is still alive and well and sitting on the throne. Trust that he is faithful. Trust that he is working for the good of all things, and trust that HE will do it.
